The Curious Case of a Bossy Wife, a Henpecked Husband & the..."Beard"!
She may be your girl-friend, wife or lover....but whatever the status quo in any of these relationships might be...guys remember one thing- "It's her way or the high-way!"
Disclaimer:
All characters appearing in this story are those you may have definitely come across in your neighborhood and the incidents that have been narrated to you are purely biased, one-sided and ego-boosting stories consisting of angry lovers, dumped boyfriends or disgruntled husbands. ;-)For this piece, our team has done an extensive investigation to nail the real culprit of this whole problem. ;-)
Readers are requested to read this blog-post in it's entirety to ascertain the 'cause' and 'effect' the culprit has had on the conjugal life of a couple before you bolster the male ego with your sympathies. ;-)
Everything is incidental and deliberate....nothing is coincidental! ;-)
And something like this is brewing here in this story too!
Wife: (looking at her husband intently) Darling....why don't you do something about it?
Husband: (Sorting out clothes for the laundry) Honey, I told you that I shall pay the bills then why don't you just keep calm!
Husband: (Sorting out clothes for the laundry) Honey, I told you that I shall pay the bills then why don't you just keep calm!
(Angry wife, pacing the room trying to get her husband's attention). Five minutes later
Wife: (Giving her husband 'that' look as though she's going to burst on that poor man) Darling, but you aren't taking me seriously...
Husband: Honey,uhhh (trembling) but I've a check-list of works...(taking out a piece of paper from his pocket and reading it aloud)
"Monday to Friday - Cook food and do the dishes
Tuesday - Buy a New Year gift for ma-in-law
Wednesday-Dinner with ma-in-law
Thursday - Take you out for the shopping bazaar
Friday - Watch the latest movie
Saturday - Buy groceries and do the laundry
And Sunday...Phhhew!! (heaving a sigh of relief)...it's holiday!"
"Monday to Friday - Cook food and do the dishes
Tuesday - Buy a New Year gift for ma-in-law
Wednesday-Dinner with ma-in-law
Thursday - Take you out for the shopping bazaar
Friday - Watch the latest movie
Saturday - Buy groceries and do the laundry
And Sunday...Phhhew!! (heaving a sigh of relief)...it's holiday!"
(Wife is impressed at her husband's devotion and dedication towards her but peeved at the tenor of her husband's mention of 'holiday'...as though seeming to sound relieved!)
Wife: (Moving her fingers over his peppered grey beard) Darling...it's time you did something about it?
Husband: (Raising his pitch in assertion and pride) Honey...if it is my beard that concerns you, then forget about it! It's time you learnt to accept the truth that keeping a beard is a part of a long-standing tradition in our family. And now you see, I and my brother are in the race for the longest beard for which I need every support of yours!
Husband: (Raising his pitch in assertion and pride) Honey...if it is my beard that concerns you, then forget about it! It's time you learnt to accept the truth that keeping a beard is a part of a long-standing tradition in our family. And now you see, I and my brother are in the race for the longest beard for which I need every support of yours!
Wife: (Mumbling to herself) I wish I'd known about it...I managed to get him do everything for me...but this! Pity my poor cheeks and lips that have borne the brunt of it!
Husband: Darling...I'd rather cook and do the laundry than forsake my beard for you!
(Wife excuses herself for a moment to attend a phone call and returns.)
Wife: But darling...I wanted to give you a good news! I 'had' cancelled all your engagements for next week...
Husband: (Excited at first and later curious) "Had" cancelled...what did you mean by that? Explain.
Husband: (Excited at first and later curious) "Had" cancelled...what did you mean by that? Explain.
Wife: Tomorrow is Sunday, the only day your check-list had no activity..so I wanted to reward you for all the hardwork you've put in by whisking you on a week's holiday for our honeymoon...
Husband: (enthusiastic) Honey...now that's a guys line! You're a genius! So when's the date? Ohhh...but hold it...you said you "had"? So what happened in between?? Why this sudden change of mind?
Wife: Oh but darling...don't get me wrong...I'm young, petite and beautiful but if you accompanied me, with that beard of yours, you'd have looked old enough to be my father and I didn't want to embarass you any further. And when you just explained me your sentiments about your beard...I gave a call to your brother. You see we had a pact, that in case you didn't agree to shave, he'd do it and fill in for you...! (On a closing note...) Oh...but darling won't you ask me where are we going?
Husband: (enthusiastic) Honey...now that's a guys line! You're a genius! So when's the date? Ohhh...but hold it...you said you "had"? So what happened in between?? Why this sudden change of mind?
Wife: Oh but darling...don't get me wrong...I'm young, petite and beautiful but if you accompanied me, with that beard of yours, you'd have looked old enough to be my father and I didn't want to embarass you any further. And when you just explained me your sentiments about your beard...I gave a call to your brother. You see we had a pact, that in case you didn't agree to shave, he'd do it and fill in for you...! (On a closing note...) Oh...but darling won't you ask me where are we going?
Husband: (Tearing his beard) Wherrrrre????
Wife: To Paris....with love! (As she says her final goodbye with a flying kiss!)
Guys...did you learn your lesson??
So what was the moral of the story?
Shave or Crave....for my attention!
Shave or Crave...for the exotic dinners and sumptuous cuisines you're going to miss!
Shave or Crave...for the safari's, sight-seeing and travel tours you're going to miss!
Shave or Crave...for the wonderful moments you are going to miss while I'm living it up in Paris!
Shave or Crave....for ME!!!
Hasta la Vista Baby!!
Ciao!
Sonaal
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(Pssst...this blog post is intended in good humor...so guys, Chillax!)
(Pssst...this blog post is intended in good humor...so guys, Chillax!)
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